Does the month of May turn you into a Zombie?

I was recently watching Shaun of the Dead* . The one scene that always stands out for me is actually the opening scene, which is basically just shots of people doing their jobs in a zombie-like state**

Today I walked halfway to the station before I even realised that I had left my house. Granted, I didn't sleep well the night before and had only had a few sips of my coffee, but still ... there I was, standing at the traffic light thinking to myself "How exactly did I get here".

It really makes me wonder: how would you know that you are turning into a zombie? I mean, unless you get bitten by a zombie, which would definitely be a huge warning sign.

Well ... now you don't need to worry about it. The people at Zombiepedia have put together this handy symptom timeline for you:

• Hour 1: Pain and discoloration (brown-purple) of the infected area. Immediate clotting of the wound (provided the infection came from a wound).
• Hour 5: Fever (99-103 degrees F), chills, slight dementia, vomiting, acute pain in the joints.
• Hour 8: Numbing of extremties and the infected area, increased fever (103-106 degrees F), increased dementia, loss of muscular coordination.
• Hour 11: Paralysis in the lower body , overall numbness, slowed heart rate.
• Hour 16: Coma.
• Hour 20: Heart stoppage. Zero brain activity.
• Hour 23: Reanimation. 

 Please note that this website does come with a disclaimer.

To be perfectly honest, this was supposed to be a post about the month of May. I know, it's hard to believe, because this is the first time that I am even mentioning May.  But if you follow my train of thought, you will see how I got here:

1. The month of May has pretty slow-paced at work, sometimes I feel a bit like a zombie
2. The start of May generally means that winter is coming and it makes me move a little slower, makes my wits a little duller - like a zombie
3. I was chatting to my friend Toni earlier and she said that she was turning into a zombie. I don't think that she meant it literally, but that is completely how I took it.

So, before this turns into a full-blown rant about the impending zombie apocalypse, here are 2 interesting facts about May for you:

• In any given year, no month ever begins or ends on the same day of the week as May does. So this year, May started on a Thursday. Which means that no other 1st of the month will fall on a Thursday. Which is good for people who could never get the hang of Thursdays.

• According to the roman poet Ovid: “Bad girls wed in May.” So ... if your anneversary falls in the month of May, please note that I am now silently judging you.***

As a bonus round: I have made 2 literary references. 20 bucks to anyone who can name them. ****


* Which, in case you don't know, is a movie about zombies. It's a comedy actually. It's pretty funny. You should definitely watch it
** the one scene that always stands out for my boyfriend is the one where they pull out a cricket bat to defend themselves instead of a baseball bat.  It is, after all, a British movie, but it still amuses him. Ironically, in my house, we don't even have a cricket bat, even though it is the only sport that I watch and has rules that I can actually understand. We do, however, have a baseball bat.

*** Mom, I am talking to you
**** Well, 2 intentional literary references. Besides Shaun of the Dead. Is it still a literary reference if it is a movie? Or is is something else. Another 10 bucks to whoever can tell me what the movie equivalent of literary reference is. Because clearly I have already reached hour 20 of turning into a zombie which is zero brain activity!